New International Flight Follies
Innocent passengers have nothing to hide.
Ever the reactionaries, the fine people at the Transportation Security Administration (as directed by the US Department of Homeland Security) have hatched some wide-ranging measures in order to alleviate the rest of us from the twin burdens of humanity and freedom. But the fun part is in how they’ve implemented these restrictions.
Of course the only true prevention for criminal acts on passenger planes is to ban travelers from planes entirely. Failing that, you might consider behaving in as arbitrary and random a way as possible, in order to… well, to confuse the terrorism out of your patrons. You might also increase the number of pat-downs (definitely), perform more physical inspection of approved carry-on luggage (probably), and institute even more draconian rules for the final hour of flight (maybe).
Airline officials have also decreed that, during the final hour of flight, it is now up to individual captains to decide whether passengers can move from their seats, can use pillows or blankets, or can hold anything on their laps, including laptop computers. Some flights found travelers being instructed to keep their hands visible.
TSA spokeswoman Sterling Payne said the agency would “continually review and update these measures to ensure the highest level of security.”
Or not. Maybe. Sometimes.
